Im tired...

I feel sick.
Tired.
Irrational.
Stepped on.
Drug through the mud
And stomped on...
My days are like years..
My nights are like seconds
Only happiness I get is when I think about going to sleep.
I'm scared that my nightmares might come back sooner or later and ruin that bit of happiness.
I put on a show...I play happiness with a A card.
I am the set of Queens.
I wake up to the thought of loneliness in the halls of 3,000 people. I dress to standout, waiting for someone to notice that I am alive. I am a person. I am bearing feelings inside this lifeless body.
I want to love. But when I do, they want to make it seem like they do then shoot me in the stomach. Making me throw up my guts, forgetting I ever didn't want anything to do with them.
I want to feel love....I want to kiss someones lips for more than 2 months. I want to not be cheated on or hid away.
I want to be alive!